A wonderful day to you and your dear family. You are on your usual column on public speaking. Frankly speaking, I feel a little embarrassed still titling our current series as “New Year Special.” As I pointed out last week, the New Year greeting is almost completely out of fashion now. Nevertheless, I choose to see this entire month of January as the runway for our takeoff on our glorious flight throughout the year, by the grace of God. As such, we will use this as our preparatory period for the task ahead.

Previously in this series, we discussed what it means to set communication agenda for the year 2013. It means carefully planning where you want to be at the end of the year and then determining the kind of communication you need to engage in to get there. We also attempted to answer the question on the necessity for setting communication agenda for the year. We said that nothing happens by chance, so, you have to deliberately decide to communicate effectively this year. You cannot continue to do the same thing and expect a different result. If indeed you want this year to be far better than last year, you have to deliberately aim at effective and contribution-oriented communication.

This week, we shall be examining two of the important areas in which you need to set communication agenda. These areas are: your personal and your business.

•Personal Life: I dare to say that this is one of the most important areas in which you need to deliberately manage your communication. This area represents your comfort zone. It represents your life when you think no one is watching. It is your life when you let down your guard. It is your life when you think you are not being scrutinized or judged. The strange thing is that, it is also your life, which you don’t want the public to know about.

There are several people who become something else when they are with “outsiders!” They change so drastically that their families don’t recognize them anymore. Some people are nicer to none family members because they want to put their best foot forward. Usually, loved ones are the victims of this kind of communication or failed communication. This kind of communication is selfish, however. Yes, it is selfish because you believe there is nothing your family can give you that you don’t have already, so, you focus on outsiders who can be of “benefit” to you. Whereas, a lot of times, you have your family and loved ones to thank for whatever you become in life.

On the other extreme, we have people who entirely focus on their families. Any benefit that should go to other people are diverted “home.” Well, there are more people outside their families than inside, so, sooner or later, they will need help from others. So, what do I advocate? Be good to everybody. Be yourself inside and outside. Know that whatever you do or say communicates something to everyone around you. They either believe that you are a responsible and reliable person to deal with, or they feel that you are better avoided. Remember, if you don’t have people’s respect and trust, they will never listen to you as a public speaker. As a speaker, your first agenda must be to develop your character, and then you can focus on contributing to other people.

•Business: ok, I agree that I am not your regular business consultant. I may not even have the slightest idea of how to do your kind of business. But I know that they say “customer is king!” Yes, you may tell me how annoying your clients or customers tend to be. In fact, I agree that sometimes, it seems like they actually set out from home to upset you. Nevertheless, that is all part of the fun of having a business. Work will be so boring if you meet the same type of people every day.

What if you decide to make difficult customers or clients a major target in your business? You can determine that you will make every customer smile about one thing or the other while being attended to. This, of course, does not make you a clown; it just means that you are going the extra mile to make your customers like you and what you have to offer.

I once had a barber who cut a class for himself. Not only was his shop very comfortable, I also got entertained by watching movies or listening to music while I waited my turn (meaning that he had heavy patronage). But that was not the best part. The guy would just not let me be; he would discuss all the topics that he believed would interest me while cutting the hair and I would never know it until he was done. He made the experience fun for me. Never minding that his fee was more than that of others around, I still followed him to the other end of town when he relocated. So, why did I stop patronizing him? Well, I moved out of town. But then, anytime I was in that town, I always went to his shop.

The big question is this, why did he make such a great impression on me that he became emblazoned in my mind as the ultimate barber? He cared for his customers and went the extra mile. He was a great barber, but who cares? It was the experience behind the barbing that I would pay for any time any day.

Communication on different levels is very important to your success in life. The better you are at communicating, the more you will enjoy your relationship with people around you. Next week, we will consider two other areas in which you need to set your agenda this year.

A wonderful day to you and your dear family. You are on your usual column on public speaking. Frankly speaking, I feel a little embarrassed still titling our current series as “New Year Special.” As I pointed out last week, the New Year greeting is almost completely out of fashion now. Nevertheless, I choose to see this entire month of January as the runway for our takeoff on our glorious flight throughout the year, by the grace of God. As such, we will use this as our preparatory period for the task ahead.

Previously in this series, we discussed what it means to set communication agenda for the year 2013. It means carefully planning where you want to be at the end of the year and then determining the kind of communication you need to engage in to get there. We also attempted to answer the question on the necessity for setting communication agenda for the year. We said that nothing happens by chance, so, you have to deliberately decide to communicate effectively this year. You cannot continue to do the same thing and expect a different result. If indeed you want this year to be far better than last year, you have to deliberately aim at effective and contribution-oriented communication.

This week, we shall be examining two of the important areas in which you need to set communication agenda. These areas are: your personal and your business.

•Personal Life: I dare to say that this is one of the most important areas in which you need to deliberately manage your communication. This area represents your comfort zone. It represents your life when you think no one is watching. It is your life when you let down your guard. It is your life when you think you are not being scrutinized or judged. The strange thing is that, it is also your life, which you don’t want the public to know about.

There are several people who become something else when they are with “outsiders!” They change so drastically that their families don’t recognize them anymore. Some people are nicer to none family members because they want to put their best foot forward. Usually, loved ones are the victims of this kind of communication or failed communication. This kind of communication is selfish, however. Yes, it is selfish because you believe there is nothing your family can give you that you don’t have already, so, you focus on outsiders who can be of “benefit” to you. Whereas, a lot of times, you have your family and loved ones to thank for whatever you become in life.

On the other extreme, we have people who entirely focus on their families. Any benefit that should go to other people are diverted “home.” Well, there are more people outside their families than inside, so, sooner or later, they will need help from others. So, what do I advocate? Be good to everybody. Be yourself inside and outside. Know that whatever you do or say communicates something to everyone around you. They either believe that you are a responsible and reliable person to deal with, or they feel that you are better avoided. Remember, if you don’t have people’s respect and trust, they will never listen to you as a public speaker. As a speaker, your first agenda must be to develop your character, and then you can focus on contributing to other people.

•Business: ok, I agree that I am not your regular business consultant. I may not even have the slightest idea of how to do your kind of business. But I know that they say “customer is king!” Yes, you may tell me how annoying your clients or customers tend to be. In fact, I agree that sometimes, it seems like they actually set out from home to upset you. Nevertheless, that is all part of the fun of having a business. Work will be so boring if you meet the same type of people every day.

What if you decide to make difficult customers or clients a major target in your business? You can determine that you will make every customer smile about one thing or the other while being attended to. This, of course, does not make you a clown; it just means that you are going the extra mile to make your customers like you and what you have to offer.

I once had a barber who cut a class for himself. Not only was his shop very comfortable, I also got entertained by watching movies or listening to music while I waited my turn (meaning that he had heavy patronage). But that was not the best part. The guy would just not let me be; he would discuss all the topics that he believed would interest me while cutting the hair and I would never know it until he was done. He made the experience fun for me. Never minding that his fee was more than that of others around, I still followed him to the other end of town when he relocated. So, why did I stop patronizing him? Well, I moved out of town. But then, anytime I was in that town, I always went to his shop.

The big question is this, why did he make such a great impression on me that he became emblazoned in my mind as the ultimate barber? He cared for his customers and went the extra mile. He was a great barber, but who cares? It was the experience behind the barbing that I would pay for any time any day.

Communication on different levels is very important to your success in life. The better you are at communicating, the more you will enjoy your relationship with people around you. Next week, we will consider two other areas in which you need to set your agenda this year.

A wonderful day to you and your dear family. You are on your usual column on public speaking. Frankly speaking, I feel a little embarrassed still titling our current series as “New Year Special.” As I pointed out last week, the New Year greeting is almost completely out of fashion now. Nevertheless, I choose to see this entire month of January as the runway for our takeoff on our glorious flight throughout the year, by the grace of God. As such, we will use this as our preparatory period for the task ahead.

Previously in this series, we discussed what it means to set communication agenda for the year 2013. It means carefully planning where you want to be at the end of the year and then determining the kind of communication you need to engage in to get there. We also attempted to answer the question on the necessity for setting communication agenda for the year. We said that nothing happens by chance, so, you have to deliberately decide to communicate effectively this year. You cannot continue to do the same thing and expect a different result. If indeed you want this year to be far better than last year, you have to deliberately aim at effective and contribution-oriented communication.

This week, we shall be examining two of the important areas in which you need to set communication agenda. These areas are: your personal and your business.

•Personal Life: I dare to say that this is one of the most important areas in which you need to deliberately manage your communication. This area represents your comfort zone. It represents your life when you think no one is watching. It is your life when you let down your guard. It is your life when you think you are not being scrutinized or judged. The strange thing is that, it is also your life, which you don’t want the public to know about.

There are several people who become something else when they are with “outsiders!” They change so drastically that their families don’t recognize them anymore. Some people are nicer to none family members because they want to put their best foot forward. Usually, loved ones are the victims of this kind of communication or failed communication. This kind of communication is selfish, however. Yes, it is selfish because you believe there is nothing your family can give you that you don’t have already, so, you focus on outsiders who can be of “benefit” to you. Whereas, a lot of times, you have your family and loved ones to thank for whatever you become in life.

On the other extreme, we have people who entirely focus on their families. Any benefit that should go to other people are diverted “home.” Well, there are more people outside their families than inside, so, sooner or later, they will need help from others. So, what do I advocate? Be good to everybody. Be yourself inside and outside. Know that whatever you do or say communicates something to everyone around you. They either believe that you are a responsible and reliable person to deal with, or they feel that you are better avoided. Remember, if you don’t have people’s respect and trust, they will never listen to you as a public speaker. As a speaker, your first agenda must be to develop your character, and then you can focus on contributing to other people.

•Business: ok, I agree that I am not your regular business consultant. I may not even have the slightest idea of how to do your kind of business. But I know that they say “customer is king!” Yes, you may tell me how annoying your clients or customers tend to be. In fact, I agree that sometimes, it seems like they actually set out from home to upset you. Nevertheless, that is all part of the fun of having a business. Work will be so boring if you meet the same type of people every day.

What if you decide to make difficult customers or clients a major target in your business? You can determine that you will make every customer smile about one thing or the other while being attended to. This, of course, does not make you a clown; it just means that you are going the extra mile to make your customers like you and what you have to offer.

I once had a barber who cut a class for himself. Not only was his shop very comfortable, I also got entertained by watching movies or listening to music while I waited my turn (meaning that he had heavy patronage). But that was not the best part. The guy would just not let me be; he would discuss all the topics that he believed would interest me while cutting the hair and I would never know it until he was done. He made the experience fun for me. Never minding that his fee was more than that of others around, I still followed him to the other end of town when he relocated. So, why did I stop patronizing him? Well, I moved out of town. But then, anytime I was in that town, I always went to his shop.

The big question is this, why did he make such a great impression on me that he became emblazoned in my mind as the ultimate barber? He cared for his customers and went the extra mile. He was a great barber, but who cares? It was the experience behind the barbing that I would pay for any time any day.

Communication on different levels is very important to your success in life. The better you are at communicating, the more you will enjoy your relationship with people around you. Next week, we will consider two other areas in which you need to set your agenda this year.